014_A_Polite_Refusal

014_A_Polite_Refusal

Recently Emi was at dinner and the host kept trying to offer more food to her. She didn’t know how to politely refuse. So in this episode Emi and Kevin discuss how to make a polite refusal.

Kevin:

Hello and welcome again to Nichibei Kaiwa Gakuin Podcasting. A great place to review English words and phrases. This week Emi has an interesting question about a polite refusal.

Kevin:

Hi Emi. How are you today?

Emi:

Good, thanks.

Kevin:

So, what’s your question?

Emi:

I have an American friend who I met in college and I was visiting her family in California last week and her mother was very nice, but she kept offering me food at dinner and I just couldn’t eat that much.

Kevin:

Uh-huh.

Emi:

And she was like…”Eat more! Here, have another! And I’m like…really full already and I was so frustrated because I didn’t want to offend her, but I didn’t know how to politely refuse her offers.

Kevin:

That does sound frustrating.

Emi:

It was. So, how can I politely say no when someone offers me something I don’t want?

Kevin:

I’m sure I can help you. Just let me get the opinion of some Nichibei instructors. First I’m going to talk with Mr. John Freeman. Excuse me, John. Have you got a minute for a question?

John Freeman:

Sure, what’s your question?

Kevin:

Emi wants to know how to refuse something when she’s offered.

John Freeman:

What kind of offer?

Kevin:

Food.

John Freeman:

Oh, well she can simply say, “No Thank you. I’m fine”.

Kevin:

That’s simple enough.

John Freeman:

It sure is. … Look, I’ve got to get to class. Is that all?

Kevin:

Yes, that’ll be fine, John. Thanks for your input.

John Freeman:

Sure, talk to you later.

Kevin:

Thanks, see you. OK Emi, There you are. A simple and polite way to refuse an offer.

Emi:

Thanks Kevin, but I tried the phrase, “Thanks, I’m fine”. In my situation the mother didn’t take no for an answer. She kept on offering.

Kevin:

Oh, I see. She didn’t really believe you. She thought you were just being polite.

Emi:

Yeah, I guess so.

Kevin:

This situation is a kind of politeness game. You have to go through two and sometimes three responses before your message is believed.

Emi:

Really?

Kevin:

It’s true.

Emi:

So, what’s the next phrase for refusing something?

Kevin:

For that I’ll ask Glenn Evanish. Hey Glenn, do you have a moment for a question?

Glenn Evanish:

Sure. What is it?

Kevin:

Emi wants to know how to politely refuse food that a friends’ mother is pushing on her. She’s already said “No thank you, I’m fine” but the mother is really pushing. What do you suggest she say next?

Glenn Evanish:

How about, “No thanks, I couldn’t”

Kevin:

What does this mean exactly?

Glenn Evanish:

It just means that you couldn’t eat anymore because you’re full.

Kevin:

OK, thanks Glenn.

Glenn Evanish:

You’re welcome.

Kevin:

There you are Emi. Two phrases. But we should have three phrases ready. So I’m going to get the opinion of Nichibei instructor Mark Melichar. Excuse me Mark. I have a quick quesiton.

Mark Melichar:

Sure go ahead.

Kevin:

If you are offered food and you say “No thanks” and then they offer again and you say “No thanks, I couldn’t” but they offer again. What can you say?

Mark Melichar:

Well, I would say “Thanks, but honestly, I couldn’t eat another bite” That should work.

Kevin:

Thanks for your input Mark.

Mark Melichar:

Glad I could help.

Kevin:

OK Emi. Let’s see if you can use all three phrases to politely refuse food. I’ll be a I’ll play the kind but pushy mother.

Emi:

OK let’s go.

Kevin: Here Emi, have another piece of baked fish.

Emi:

No thanks, I’m fine.

Kevin:

Don’t be shy, you’ve hardly eaten anything.

Emi:

No thanks, I couldn’t.

Kevin:

Go on. It’s just this little piece.

Emi:

Thanks, but honestly, I couldn’t eat another bite.

Kevin:

OK. If you’re sure. Good job Emi! I think you’re ready for any kindly mother now.

Emi:

Thanks for you help.

Kevin:

My pleasure. Now lets review the phrases for a polite refusal. No Thank you. I’m fine. No thanks, I couldn’t. Thanks but, honestly, I couldn’t eat another bite. … And that brings us to the end of another episode. I would like to thank Emi and the teachers who helped out with this episode. Was this English a little tough for you well, please remember that you can read the transcript for this episode at www.nichibei.ac.jp/podcasting. This podcast is a production of Nichibei Kaiwa Gakuin and Live Mix Media.

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